Don Vito loves pussy

FEBRUARY 15- Turns out that MTV personality Vincent "Don Vito" Margera's lewd behavior was not limited to allegedly groping teenage girls during an autograph session last August in Colorado. A cop testified earlier this month that when she and her female partner busted the 50-year-old Margera, he called them "psycho bitches" and claimed that he was being arrested because, "you want me to lick your pussy later." Margera, who was a regular on MTV's "Viva La Bam" and appeared on "Jackass," both of which starred his nephew Bam, also remarked that, "your pussy must be so tight you can't even smile," recalled Melissa Mayne, a cop.

Margera is facing charges that he touched the breasts and buttocks of three girls who attended a promotional event at a mall skate park. At the time of the incident, two of the alleged victims were 12 and a third girl was 14. One of the younger girls told police that as she got Margera's autograph, he grabbed her breast and remarked, "Big boob."

Ladies and gentlemen, it's official: i think I have a new idol. Up until this morning, my idol was Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs. Ever since I was a child, there was something about that look on his face when he tucked his dick between his legs, put on makeup, and said "i'd fuck me so hard" that always made me want to make more of my life.

Well scoot aside Bill, untuck your dick, and let the fat bitch out of the well, because I've got a new idol: Don-fucking-Vito. I mean, how fucking awesome is this guy? If you aren't able to see the awesome-ness at play here, let me walk you through it. First off, Don Vito is famous for eating anything that his nephew puts in front of him while, of course, his nephew and all of his douche-bag friends beat the ever-living-shit out of him. Second, this has somehow resulted in people wanting autographs from him. So does this man just sit back and thank the good-Lord for his fame.... NO!!! He goes and grabs some titty. Then he looks at the girl and mutters "big boob" which is the creepiest and most money line ever said by a 50 year-old man at a skate park (trust me I know... click here to see a pic of me teaching my boyfriend how to skate). To top it all off, Donnie Vito gets arrested and then tells the female cop that her pussy is tight and needs to be licked by him. Don't get me wrong... I am not speaking for her pussy, but if I was a pussy, who else would I want licking me??? Don-Fucking-Vito, that's who!!!

Don Vito: for eating roast beef sandwiches like they are bagel bites, for saying "big boob," for being so horny despite not being able to see your own dick, and for sharing my love of tight pussy.... You are our 'Celeb of the Week.'