Bob Barker cures hangovers

PASADENA, Calif. - The man with a golden voice who gave away warehouses of refrigerators and sofas during his 35 years as host of "The Price Is Right" says the secret to a good game-show host is the ability to listen.

Barker, who turned 83 in December, said he wanted to retire "while I'm still young," and credits his vegetarian diet for his good health. He had a different answer when asked how he's able to maintain his energy.

"Booze," he said to a laugh.

I don't remember much from my college years, but one thing I will never forget is the sense of arousal I got from rolling out of my bunk bed, turning on the tube, and seeing Bob drain a 50 foot putt. His voice, like a shot of bourbon, was so smooth and sensual it just seemed to melt the hangover away. He was a very excitable man however (as attested by many of Barker's Beauties and anyone nearing a $1 spin), yet he could be so warm and caring the moment after the little hiker man fell off the cliff. To watch him control, and almost will, those Plinko chips into big money slots was like watching any great master during the prime of their career; be it Michelangelo, Frank Lloyd Wright, or Bob Villa. All of this in addition to his saintly work stopping the needless reproduction of dogs and cats. The man was simply god-like.

Once he does finally retire he should write a diet book about living well and staying active into your 80's. I need to know the secret of his survival on vegetables, fresh pussy, Johnny Walker, and Viagra.

You will be missed, but never forgotten!