NEW YORK (Reuters) - Porn star Ron Jeremy wants to be taken seriously -- with his clothes on.Dressed in a dark track suit with a protruding belly that shows he is past his physical prime, Jeremy hardly strikes you as one of the most successful American porn stars.
But Jeremy, 53, who claims to have been with more than 4,000 women during a 30-year career, is the first to admit that he is not your stereotypical sex star. He believes his average looks are a key to his success.
As a fellow Jew I am rooting for Mr. Jeremy to succeed, as his quest is one all Jewish men have been on for almost 3,000 years…to be taken seriously. For too long we have been mocked for our curly afros, slumping shoulders, and abnormally large calves. IT MUST STOP! We may be men small in stature, but beneath our jungle of coarse pubic hair lays a sleeping anaconda. Ron has done more for the Jewish movement than anyone in recent memory, Moses included.
I use to be the butt of everyone’s jokes, but that all changed one magical day. My mother had run out of laundry detergent, so I was forced to go to school with no underwear. During gym class I was dominating on the badminton courts when my gym teacher came from behind and “pants” me, leaving me exposed for the whole senior class to see. All I heard were shrieks of shock and awe as my flaccid dong hung along side my well defined quadriceps. Frozen from embarrassment the only thing I could think of doing was some of my penis puppetry tricks that I usually do for Rosh Hashanah. Soon people were laughing and slapping me high-five. After that it was like everyday was a bar mitzvah; women wanted to be with me, and men want to be me.
It is sad when Jewish men can only be taken seriously when they are in the midst of an anal gang bang or doing penis puppetry. We, as a people, are more than our freakishly large genitalia. That said...I am sure you have all heard the expression “once you go black you never go back”; well at the Temple we have a similar expression, “once you go Israelite you're always a sodomite".
4 comments:
I am a Jew too and have the same endowment as Ron, and my girlfriend is very glad of that! Great job Ron!
ron jeremy was very attractive when he was younger-- a nice body, beautiful blue eyes, and even attractive legs and feet! he still is a cute teddy bear (but would be sensational if he lost weight and cut that awful hair). jewish men are hot-- dont sell yourself short, dude!
Jews are hot until they break some magical age barrier when they sprout hair from strange places... leaving them in a state resembling the Great Lord, Cthulu.
I am not Jewish but Jewish men find me like I give off some sort of signal. I have been told I have shiksa appeal. I don't mind. Jewish guys are hot! The only problem is the mom doesn't like me because I am not Jewish.
I don't know why Jewish guys have a bad rep. I have only positive things to say about Jewish men and so do my girlfriends.
I had a long term friend with benefits who was Jewish. He was enthusiastic in the sack and willingly corrupted. I taught him some new tricks. We had a lot of fun! I remember him fondly. :)
Jewish men rock! They are yummy and hot in the sack.
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