Patches needs his ride pimped

Here we have Hollywood legend Rip Torn, best known as Patches O’Houlihan from Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story, after he had a few drinks and drove his 1995 Chevy Cavalier into a tractor-trailer. Cut Patches some slack as his Ford Taurus was in the shop getting automated door locks.

A few observation here; clearly our celebrities are under paid, I mean I know this guy is no Emilio Estevez, but come on a 1995 Chevy Cavalier? That is the kind of car fat Emo kids in high school drive, not heroes like Rip.

Isn’t it a little cold in NY for Patches to be cruising around with his window down? That is the only logical conclusion one can draw from such a disheveled comb-over. So judging by the hair and that dirty old man look in his eyes he must have tied one on and had his window down as he was trolling for young girls.

How fucked up do you have to be to not see a tractor-trailer? I mean a tree, a small foreign car, even a pedestrian I can understand but not a tractor-trailer.

Finally, who would have ever thought a guy who names himself Rip Torn could possibly have a drinking problem?

We still love you Patches!