The Japanese are like bears

"A man who went missing in western Japan survived in chilly weather without food and water for over three weeks by falling into a state similar to hibernation, doctors said…'Uchikoshi fell into a state similar to hibernation and many of his organs slowed, but his brain was protected,' said Dr. Shinichi Sato, head of the hospital’s emergency unit. 'I believe his brain capacity has recovered 100 percent.'"

This has got to be bullshit! How can any Japanese man go three weeks without eating at Benihana's?

But say it is true, who can sleep three weeks? I slept 15 hours once, but that was only after a full day of drinking Jack Daniels and snorting copious amounts of cocaine.

But then again, maybe this guy is just brilliant. The next time I'm pulled over or the next time a guy is about to beat my ass at a bar, I will just fall asleep for 3 weeks because when I wake up things will be all good.

Regardless, one thing is true: the part about Ochikoshi's brain capacity recovering 100%. In fact, I think that the guy's head has recovered 264%. GO BACK TO SLEEP JAPANESE GUY, YOUR HEAD IS ABOUT TO BURST!!!