Love is a beautiful thing!!!!

SIOUX FALLS, South Dakota- Even college students might need a lesson or two about dating. Laurie Chaplin, a relationships counselor and licensed therapist who's been married 28 years, will be the instructor. "Some people may think it's a slack course, but I think they'll come out with something that changes their lives," Chaplin said. "We go to college and get an education. But our love relationships impact us more than anything else." In class they'll learn about infatuation and when it's best to break up. "Sometimes it's much more loving and smart to break up," she said.

I must admit, it may be impossible for me to remain objective on this one (mainly because I am incapable of love due to the fact that I was raised by wolves for 13 years as a child following a wrong turn while skiing. The experience sucked, but I did learn how to lick my own balls, which is a hell of a party trick).

However, if I was able to love, I definitely wouldn't go looking for love at college. In fact, why even offer a class this ridiculous? If the college is set on impacting the lives of its students, then it should offer more relevant classes:

"How to con a girl into unprotected sex (aka "Can I just put the tip in?")"
"How to pretend like you are nice and caring" (taught by Dr. Frank T.J. Mackey)
"If you take 40 milligrams of Adderral a day, are you a drug addict?"
"How to perform after a fifth of Bacardi"
"How to masturbate four times a day with that pesky dorm roommate"

You see, if one takes those five classes (15 units), which only meet Tuesdays/Thursdays, then the student will not only expand his/her mind but will be free for five days to do what he or she pleases: Namely getting drunk, taking prescription speed, masturbating, boning, and oh yeah.... NOT FALLING IN LOVE!!!!